A picture of a fisting dildo on Amazon
Fisting, which has different names such as handballing, fist~fucking, brachiovaginal, or brachioproctic for insertion, is a sexual activity that involves inserting a hand or fist into the vagina or anal cavity. This can be done on oneself but it is typically conducted on one person by another. So where did this 'taboo' act begin?
History of Fisting
Fisting is often thought of and became popular by gay culture, and it may have not existed until the twentieth century. Sex educator, Robert Morgan Lawrence, believes that this practice dates back thousands of years. The most famous fisting club in the world, The Catacombs, which was located in San Francisco, operated during the 1970's and the 1980's. Another famous fisting club was The Handball. Because personalized lubricants weren't available back then, crisco was commonly used in place of.
What is Fisting?
Fisting, or handballing, is the process of inserting one's own hand or fist or anothers hand or fist into the vagina or rectum for sexual enjoyment. The final goal is to insert the whole hand or fist inside of the one receiving the fisting, up into the wrist. It often is practiced inserting the fist as far as it will go. With a lot of lube, and a lot of practice, one could insert or take an entire open hand or an entire closed fist in the vagina or the rectum.
Why Fisting?
There are several reasons why people find this activity so appealing. It isn't limited to one gender or another, nor is it limited to one sexuality over another. Anyone can give it a try.
The Kink Factor
Fisting can be viewed as really kinky which gives an extra wow factor to the act. It can be alluring because people may feel like they are exploring some taboo territory that provides an imminent kinky thrill.
An illustration showing a woman fisting herself
Extreme
Another reason people may find this activity appealing is because it is extreme. It is so non~traditiinal and viewed as an extreme method to gain sexual gratification. Which in turn, turns people on.
Challenge
One aspect of this method is the challenge view. One could look at this as one more thing they would like to achieve in a sexual encounter. It is a satisfying challenge to be able to claim because it isn't one that is done quickly or in a rush. It takes absolute time, energy, and a lot of patience.
BDSM
Including this kink in a power play or a dominant/submissive relationship, could be very alluring. They may be drawn to this method for the pain and/or pleasure associated with this activity and with the BDSM dynamic. It holds especially true for those who have the sadists and the machohists ideation.
Stimulation
Finallly, there is the physical aspect of fisting. It provides a new level of physical stimulation than anything that normally gives us internal physical pleasure. The size, the shape, the depth all reach to new and different heights in reaching into the physical depths. It also provides different types of texture and movement that may have never been felt before. It is reaching new stimulation in an uncommon avenue. Receiving a whole hand or fist inside of you or inserting a whole hand or fist inside of someone, can be extremely arousing.
Trying Fisting
So maybe you've heard and read all you can about this practice and you and your partner have talked about it, and you both have decided that you want to give it a go, where do you begin? Begin by agreeing upon a safe word. Make sure you have your words in place in case you want to stop at any given time. In BDSM play, typically the words green for 'I'm alright ..keep going', yellow is saying 'slow down some...this is too intense', and red means 'stop ...this is too much' are used to signal what one is feeling in the moment. So once you have agreed upon your safe words, what should be next?
Wash your Hands
Since you will be inserting your hand/fist inside of someone, the first thing you would want to do is trim and file your nails. Make sure they're smooth with no jagged or sharp edges. Then thoroughly wash and scrub your hands. Nails hide a lot of bacteria and our hands touch everything, so you what to make sure to throughly wash them.
Hand dildo showing the beak like 'silent duck' or the 'duck~billing' maneuver commly used in the beginning stages of fisting
Techniques
The technique where the person that is inserting their hand into the vagina or the rectum, holds their fingers together to resemble a ducks bill. This method is called the 'silent duck' or 'duck billing'. Fisting is not a quick process. It takes patience, practice and lots of lube. The entire fist may not be inserted completely the first go around. Fisting is not forcing the fist or hand completely into the vagina or rectum. Forcing the hand into an orifice is what is called 'punching'. Instead, all the fingers are kept closed together, making the beak like duck bill, and then very carefully and slowly inserted into the vagina or the rectum. In the more vigorous forms of fisting, like punching or punchfisting, is where a fully closed fist is inserted and withdrawn slowly.
People who are more experienced in receiving the fist, may take two fists at one time, which is called double~fisting. In these cases, sexual gratification comes more from the stretching out of the vagina or anus, than from the in and out movement of the hands.
Risk
There are some risks to engaging in fisting. Fisting can cause tears, lacerations or perforation, of the vagina, perineum, the rectum or the colon. Which can result in serious injury or even death. Also in any activity that forces air into the vagina can cause a deadly air embolism, especially during pregnancy. People who engage in this activity are urged to use latex gloves, lots of lube, and make sure to have trimmed, smooth nails.
According to Wikipedia, in a 2021 study, found that men who participated in anal fisting were more likely to experience fecal incontinence then those men who had engaged in other forms of anal sex. The study found that 18.1% of men who had engaged in anal fisting experienced some form of fecel incontinence compared to 7.2% of men who did not engage in anal fisting.
Anal fisting can cause damage to the rectal mucosa, which can increase the possibility of transmission of STD's or Sexually Transmitted Diseases.
An illustration of a female receiving a fist in the 'silent duck' or 'duck billing' method
Relax
So now you have spoken with your partner and made your safe words, you have trimmed your nails and washed your hands, you have understood the risks, what's next? It's time to relax. Being fisted for the first time can be a little apprehensive but both you and your partner need to be as comfortable and relaxed as possible. Make sure you have set aside enough time to participate in this activity because I cannot stress enough that it is time consuming and not a quick and easy activity. Try and clear your mind of all clutter, get all your supplies together and within reach, choose your comfortable location, turn your phones off, lock your doors and put on some soothing music.
Get Aroused
The more aroused your body is, the easier it will be to receive the fist. Arousal takes time, especially for women. So as I have mentioned before, take it slow and make a lot of effort to get turned on. Because if you both just dive in without being mentally and physically prepared, it is going to be a disappointing fisting session. Not only disappointing but this could possibly lead to unwanted injuries such as tears, lacerations, and painful stretching. So it is well worth the time and effort into getting aroused and get aroused as much as you possibly can before you begin. It is extremely important to take that time and effort to getting a satisfying fisting session. And to make sure you stay aroused though out the session, try using a vibrator while receiving the fist.
Lube, Lube and More Lube
Do not attempt fisting without proper lubrication. This will lead to painful insertion and skin tears and all kinds of unpleasant things. Instead use lube, and some more lube, and even more lube than that. This especially holds true for anal fisting because the anus does not produce any lube on it's own. But you still want to use lots of lube on a vaginal insertion also. Definitely do not depend on the natural lube of a vagina to fist. And absolutely do not use any anal numbing lube for fisting. This will numb you during the event but when the effects wear off, you will feel every skin tear and will feel the pain. Always know when to stop. Listen to your body and let it guide you. Do not push past when your body is telling you to quit.
Take it Slow
As I have mentioned several times already, take it slow. Don't dive in thinking it's not going to take much time, practice or patience. It is more than likely that you're not going to be able to insert or take a whole fist the first session. Work up to it slowly and carefully, looking for any signs of discomfort and pain. More than likely you will have to practice and do stretching exercises to be able to take a whole fist. So use your fingers and sex toys to gradually increase the size of what you can insert or receive. This will help you prepare to take a whole fist.
No Bondage
If this is your first time, I do not recommend being tied up and unable to move when trying to take a whole fist. Also do not use any gags so if something is painful and you want to stop, you need to be able to speak that to your partner. It is safe and rational to stay in control when receiving a fist for the first time. And probably the fist few times.
Gentle Exit
When taking the fist out, make it as gentle as it was going in. Again, do not rush it and take it slow. Be as careful with the exit, as careful as you were with the entry. Damage and skin tears and lacerations can occur on the way out as well as on the way in.
Orgasm
If you didn't orgasm during the fisting session, it is a good idea to do so afterwards. This helps the muscles return back to normal in the vagina and the pelvic floor muscles.
Urinate
Another good idea is to pee when you're done with a fisting session. This helps to prevent UTI's or Urinary Tract Infections.
So there you have the instructions on a safe and comfortable fisting session!! As always talk in depth with your partner and have your safe words in place. Have fun and stay safe!!
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